Let Them Eat Cake? No Thank You!

As we all know and heard, the government gave $170 billion in taxpayer money to AIG (American International Group). And even thought the company reported a loss of $61 billion, they somehow are managing to pay executives $165 million in bonuses (I guess for setting a record or something). Needless to say, the not-royal we were not amused. And our government’s big response boils down to: “You should feel ashamed of yourselves.” Seriously? You fail, government.

What is with the 21st century turning everyone into pussies? I remember back in the day, whenever there were too many rich people blatantly stealing from the poor there would be a revolution – complete with guillotine, anarchy and a short guy in charge. Or warriors from up north or far east would start marauding and pillaging, storming castles and sending a hail of fiery arrows down on helpless defenders. Back in the times when European monarchies mattered, if the ruling body was displeased, entire bloodlines were eliminated. But now, the government can basically hand over a blank check to corrupt gout-sufferers who proceed to spend the money on themselves and the best response is a whiny “Give it back!” I didn’t realize that Congress is now that 5-year-old trying to grab his Wolverine toy back from his too-tall big brother who’s holding it hostage at arms length.

Why can’t we, oh I don’t know, give the taxpayer money back to the taxpayers?! I paid my bills on time, don’t use limos to get to work, and I’ve managed not to screw over families and other people’s futures. All I got back was $200 from Uncle Sam. That can’t even support a Wall Street stockbroker’s cocaine habit for the day. What. The. Fuck.

If you’re pissed, don’t just write a scathing editorial. These execs obviously don’t feel ashamed, not when they can bounce to some island and hire prostitutes to boost their egos. This shame based society bullshit isn’t working anymore. Let’s all go to Home Depot, buy some pitchforks and tiki torches and do this thang old-school (or medieval-school, whatever). Although, we’d probably have to use Google to find out where these people live, but still. Old-school!

George Bush - The Third Destiny's Child?

I feel like I should do something about this. You must not have electricty (or access to a newspaper) if you missed this but President George W. Bush was attacked by footwear while speaking to the Iraqi press.



Now I'm not even going to try and comment on the political or comedic ramifications of this journalist's act, nor will I condone or condemn this behavior. But is it just me or does President Hamid Karzai's face look far too reminiscent of Beyonce and Kelly's face when that Destiny's Child fell on stage during that live performance? You be the judge.


Destiny's Child Fall - More free videos are here

You Can Love Obama But Not Be In Love With Obama

I'm definitely glad that Barack Obama is now our president, not just for the historic value, but because I can finally stop getting e-mail for me to "do X for Obama."

Case in point, about 2 weeks ago my co-worker, who is an Obamaniac (or some sort of Obama portmanteau), found an article online about people who were fasting for Obama. The group, cleverly named Fasting For Obama, was comprised of people who refused to eat until Obama was president. And my co-worker was convincing me that that is a great way to show support. Newsflash: no it isn't. Do you want to know how I supported Barack Obama? - by voting for him in the election.

Seriously people, this is a democracy and not a cult. I'm not going to starve for Obama, or get circumsized for Obama, or drink the Kool-Aid for Obama. This isn't Obama's gate; it's an election to be US President. I show my support by walking to the booth and pulling the lever. Bam! Three minutes worth of support. Again that's how democracy works.

I wish people would stop being fanatic converters. Is this just written in our genetic code that whenever humans see a charismatic leader, they feel a need to go to extremes to praise him or her? Why do people have to go "I love XYZ so much that I'm going to be a blind follower/jumpsuit-wearing nutcase?" And the sad part is that quite a few of the people who are Crusaders for Obama probably didn't vote for the election because they caught some illness from Standing In The Arctic Circle for Obama or their organs shut down from doing nothing but Drinking Water for Obama.

All I'm saying is this: Barack Obama is a wonderful person but he is NOT the Messiah. Just because both he and Jesus have hair like wool does not mean Obama is turning water into wine. Calm down Super-Dems. Just. Calm. Down.