If you are an up-and-coming entertainer, it is a well-established fact that you will Google yourself at least 8 times a day. In the course of said internet searches, there will always be one person who either has your name or a very similar name who seems to be neck and neck with you as you vie for the top spot. My Google nemesis is Kelvin Cato. He’s a basketball player who’s been around for a while but is now a free agent. His career isn’t particular stellar (I could probably beat him) and it’s frustrating because we have such similar names that googling “Calvin Cato” will pull up articles about him or message boards saying “Calvin Cato sucks at b-ball and life.” Granted I have a small but critical fanbase, but come on people, start searching for me and clicking on my relevant shit.
Why I’m angry is that I had stupidly used this Google feature through my Gmail to up my blog to the number one spot on the page thinking that, “Hey if people want to find Calvin Cato’s blog, bam here is the blog of Calvin Cato.” As it turned this only shows for me whenever I’m logged into my Gmail, and I’m constantly signed into my email. All. The. Time. So I signed out, and to my horror, not only is my sadly neglected MySpace page first, not only is that damn misspelled Kelvin Cato article there on page 1, but my blog has fallen to the bottom of page two. This is sacrilege I tell you, sacrilege. Sure I’ve been less prolific and I’ve petered out on some of my writing projects, but come on people. Boost this blog back to page 1 at least. How many times do I have to say Calvin Cato is important in a blog entry before Google connects Calvin Cato to Calvin Cato’s blog? I mean seriously, Calvin Cato works ridiculously hard blogging for Calvin Cato because Calvin Cato is a Calvin Cato kind of writer writing Calvin Cato stuff for Calvin Cato’s constituents. Give Calvin Cato a break, statisticians!
Calvin Cato.
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