Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Yuengling - Ironic To Like Now?

Of all the inexpensive beers I've drank in my life, nothing is more enjoyable than Yuengling. My friend was recently telling me that Yuengling is set to replace Pabst Blue Ribbon (affectionately called PBR or Peeber) as the new working-man's drink imbibed by non-working pseudo-artsy 20-somethings. I didn't want to believe it but I came across this Salon article from months ago that confirmed it.

First of all, may I be the first to say "Noooo!" I've liked Yuengling ever since high school (I mean I totally didn't drink in high school because that's not even legal, but I smelled an open bottle once and it seemed enjoyable) and my affair was rekindled when I graduated college (it's legal now; it's just wrong to indulge before noon). I like the taste, the color, the body. I even like the green bottle. And best of all, it's inexpensive without being cheap. At any bar (in NYC at least) you can find a Yuengling for $4-7 and not feel like a cretin.

I'm not rich by any means but I just can't stand PBR. It's watery and tasteless and not even that carbonated. I hate the fact that it comes in a can so cheap you can taste the metal flaking off in your drink. I hate the people who drink PBRs - snobby types who cry "Poverty!" but always manages to have a baggy of drugs. PBRs just feel dirty to me. It's like seeing that constantly unwashed guy who somehow manages to get laid despite having a bad personality. I look at PBRs and go "What the hell?"

I already get enough flak for being a hipster because I have a messenger bag and use polysyllabic words in conversation (much like that last sentence), but I'm just learned. And the last thing I need is for waif-thin trust fund babes to take Yuengling's (one of the last vestiges of urbanite coolness) and invalidate it by appropriating and cannibalizing it. I don't want to hear a crew of people make up insipid pet names (by callng it a 'Ling or a YL or a Double G) and then talk really loudly at the bar about how they're so poor that this beer is all they can drink and then swap dealer numbers. Blech!

Please hipsters, keep away from making Yuengling the new symbol of irony. There are tons of shitty beers you can make into your mascot instead. What about Schlitz, eh? It's making a comeback...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You and the Salon guy neglected to mention this choice dialogue from "Blue Velvet", which I think may be a crucial part of PBR's cachet.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=snhiofL2Rh4