Nine Ways A Employer Can Cause A Temp To Quit "Unexpectedly"

Hey Employer Man! Do you always wonder why you hire temporary or permanent employees who suddenly quit without warning? I know you think that in these economic times, anyone should be happy to work $10 an hour Xeroxing documents and fiddling around with Excel, but sometimes you may do and say certain things that "unwittingly" let your temp know how much you really value their time. Here's a list of 9 ways to drive a temp running into the foothills of unemployment:

(1) Constantly calling your new temp by the previous temp's name.

(2) Talking within earshot of your temp about a contingency plan in case he or she quits.

(3) Having a one-on-one "meeting" with your temp to explain the difference between dry and wet trash after falsely accusing him of throwing out a paper cup in the wrong bin.

(4) Asking your temp why he or she feels the need to have bathroom breaks longer than 2 minutes.

(5) Telling your temp a 10-minute-long story about hanging out with a rapper, then concluding the story with "I never thought I'd have so much in common with someone so...urban. You know what I mean?"

(6) Explaining to your temp that his or her current task involves a lot of math and then inquiring about his or her "adding skills."

(7) Talking to your temp about a relative who's marrying a black person, then expressing worry that their future child will have "to deal with that difficult black hair...no offense!"

(8) Responding to your temp's "Good morning" with "uh-huh" and then slamming your office door.

(9) Saying "Oh I didn't realize you were a reader!" in response to finding a novel on your temp's desk.